Saturday, February 12, 2011

all my friends are dreamers and drunks

i hate banks. maybe not "hate," although I want to hate them, in fact would hate them, if the very thought of banks didn't make me so goddamn tired. and when I got this latest letter, stating that I'm now going to be charged a monthly "maintenance" fee for having an open checking account, I wasn't even surprised. my bank is like a consistently disappointing child and I am the aging parent who finally says, fuck it, the kid's on his own, I've got to live my life now. happy in my empty nest.


Steve said...

There needs to be a banking equivalent of a dog. The beauty of owning a dog is that they rarely disappoint. I've never seen a dog owner scolding their K-9 in the middle of the street with a scathing summation as to how they've let them down over the course of their lives. And the beauty of a dog, is that even if it does disappoint (whether through bad behavior or rabies), three fingers of whiskey down the pipe and a good bullet to the offender's head is all it takes to make the problem go away. Like Old Yeller. But with banking. And more guns.

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